To Be a Writer and Not Be Writing by Kamy Wicoff

INTRO: All writers can be insecure, even authors who have a publishing press. Kamy Wicoff is the founder of She Writes and She Writes Press. She is here today to tell us about her writing insecurity. Her story is one that will resonate with so many. Please help me welcome her! 

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Amazon

Last spring, my first novel, Wishful Thinking, came out. For six months I lived the Writer-with-a-capital-W life, touring the country giving readings, begging book clubs to have me, doing some interviews and speaking on a few panels, and, of course, obsessively checking Amazon. And then it was over. It was time. I had to get back to work, to be a writer-with-a-small-w again, working alone.

Initially I was thrilled. I was exhausted from hocking my book to anyone who would listen, and the faint taint of humiliation that comes from constantly selling yourself had long overstayed its welcome. Ah, to be back at the art again! To immerse myself in a world of my creation, taking dictation from my characters and barreling through a story, rather than struggling to be heard in a crowded marketplace, hammering away at inane social media I could care less about!

So I sat down. And nothing came.

It’s now been another six months. Still nothing.

I am terrified.

I have only published two books in my life (the “only” depends on your perspective, of course, and right now, without an idea in sight, it is how I feel)  – the first was nonfiction, and the second was a novel. Between the nonfiction book and the novel, there were several years where I was fairly sure I’d never write again. But I had some good excuses. I went through a painful divorce. I had very young children. I didn’t want to write another memoir, and had never written fiction and had no idea if I could. When the idea for my novel came to me it was like a bolt from the blue, a lifeline from the gods of creativity to a new way of being a writer that I was sure was the right one at last. I’d never written a novel before, and I wrote one I was proud of. Surely now there would be no more dry spells. Surely now I had found my groove.

The thing is, writing, for me, anyway, doesn’t work like that. I know lots of writers who start the next book before the last book has even come out. (I am Facebook friends with a lot of them, unfortunately for my ego.) But I have spent the last several months trying to make peace with the fact that that isn’t me. It’s hard. It’s scary. I have told myself that by reading, journaling, living life and focusing on my business (I am the founder of SheWrites.com and its publishing arm, She Writes Press), I am “filling the well,” preparing myself in ways I can’t understand now for whatever it is I’m going to write later. But it is very hard to have faith, to be a writer and not be writing. Can I say I am a writer during the times when I don’t write at all?

An age-old question, I know. The muse is fickle, and more likely to visit when we are not chasing her. But it’s hard to wait without panicking that I may be waiting forever. 

So I ask you: what do you do in the in-between, when inspiration doesn’t come yet? I’d love to know. I’ve got some time to kill.

Thank you, Kamy, for being our guest today!

Bio:

Kamy Wicoff is the bestselling author of the novel Wishful Thinking and the nonfiction book I Do But I Don’t: Why The Way We Marry Matters. She is the founder of one of the world’s largest communities for women writers, www.shewrites.com, with 27,000 members worldwide. She is also the founder, with Brooke Warner, of She Writes Press, a “third way” publisher leading the way in creating alternative publishing companies for authors. Kamy serves on the board of Girls Write Now, a New York City nonprofit that pairs high school girls with professional women writers as their mentors. 

To learn more, visit: www.kamywicoff.com.