I would like to introduce everyone to Alicia Dean, editor
for The Wild Rose Press under the name Ally Robertson. She is discussing
filtering out filter words to help us “show” not “tell”. This is a great lesson, and I hope you enjoy it.
Hello all…I’m happy to be joining the IWSG today, and I’m especially happy to share a little about revising/editing with
you. I love working with authors, and if my experience and limited knowledge
helps in any small way, I’m thrilled.
Working for The Wild Rose Press, I
receive many fantastic submissions, and of course, I receive many that are not
so fantastic. J Even out of
the well-written, stupendous, engaging manuscripts, I often find that sometimes
the authors lean a little heavily on filter words. These are ‘filter’ words
because they distance the reader from the action and from the character’s
emotion. Words like ‘felt,’ ‘thought,’ ‘wondered,’ ‘heard,’ ‘saw,’ ‘knew,’
‘noticed,’ etc. Avoiding words like these can make your writing much more
active. Filter words are also closely related to ‘telling’ vs ‘showing.’ If you
say your character felt or thought something, rather than just
‘showing’ the thought or emotion, then you are telling, when you could be
showing.
A few quick examples--and these are
taken from recent books I’ve read by extremely successful NYT
Best-Selling Authors. Of course, who am I to advise someone who’s done
exceedingly well without my advice? However, I couldn’t help but be a bit
jarred when I read lines like:
·
She felt panic race through her bloodstream
· How would she ever get him to talk? Maya
thought.
·
Maya saw him exit a door on the east side of
the building.
·
She knew Mark had been working there for four
years.
Just a few
brief tweaks would bring us much closer to what’s happening:
·
Panic raced through her bloodstream
·
How would she ever get him to talk? (We’re in
Maya’s point of view, and there were no dialogue tags, so readers know she
‘thought’ it)
·
He exited a door on the east side of the
building. (We’re in her POV, and if the author just states that he exited a
door, readers will know she ‘saw’ it happen)
·
Mark had been working there for four years.
(Again, readers know she ‘knew’ it because it was stated while in her POV)
I know it’s worse for me than an average
reader, since it’s my job to ‘edit,’ but whether or not a reader realizes that
the author is using filter words and telling instead of showing, they DO know
whether or not they can relate, and I believe they can relate more fully if we
try to avoid filter words that might distance them.
Having said that, I would definitely not
reject a manuscript because of overusage of filter words, but it is something
we would most assuredly work on during edits.
Do you have the nasty filter word habit?
You might just consider words like this as you’re revising, and see how many
you can eliminate to make your story more active. Even now, I read books I’ve
written and I find where I used filter words too. It’s easy to let them slip
in. Thank you for joining me today. If you have any questions, I’ll be happy to
answer them.
Check out Alicia's blog every Tuesday for her Two-Minute Tips where she offers quick tips for busy writers. https://aliciadean.com/alicias-blog/
Check out Alicia's blog every Tuesday for her Two-Minute Tips where she offers quick tips for busy writers. https://aliciadean.com/alicias-blog/
BIO:
Alicia Dean lives in Edmond, Oklahoma.
She has three grown children and a huge network of supportive friends and
family. She writes mostly contemporary suspense and paranormal, but has also
written in other genres, including a few vintage historicals.
In addition to being an author of more
than twenty-five published works, Alicia is both a freelance editor and an
editor for The Wild Rose Press, under the name, Ally Robertson, in their
suspense line.
Other than reading and writing, her
passions are Elvis Presley, MLB, NFL (she usually works in a mention of one or
all three into her stories) and watching her favorite televisions shows like
Vampire Diaries, Justified, Sons of Anarchy, Haven, The Mindy Project, and
Dexter (even though it has sadly ended, she will forever be a fan). Some of her
favorite authors are Michael Connelly, Dennis Lehane, Lee Child, Lisa Gardner,
Sharon Sala, Jordan Dane, Ridley Pearson, Joseph Finder, and Jonathan
Kellerman…to name a few.
Find Alicia Here:
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